Shrink Rap: A Church Burned and Compassion Was Ignited
Written by Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.DSeptember 2, 2009 – 1:17 pm
A church burned to the ground last week. As I drove back to my old neighborhood, I could feel a tightening knot in my stomach. Something compelled me to see the charred grounds, to gaze upon the remnants of wood, stained glass and brick, and to feel the sadness.
As you all know by now, the beautiful, old, venerable St. Elmo United Methodist Church caught fire and burned. It is now known that the reason was worn, faulty wiring, as is found in many of these old churches, and not caused by arson nor by a hate crime.
One of the many sad pieces of this story is that the media, in the way the media does, was quick to jump on the sensational possibility that because this church is known to be “liberal,” that the fire was intentional. Is that what happens when one congregation’s belief is different from another, more conservative, belief? They start a Christian war? Do we understand the oxymoron of “Christian war?” To be Christian, or “Christ-like,” is to simply follow in the path of Christ. What do wars, fires, and hate have to do with a path of love, forgiveness, and compassion?
No, that’s not what happened. When I spoke with the pastor and my good friend, Mark Dowell, he said, “We don’t stir up hate here. Our only agenda is to love people, and to come together to love God.” And he spoke of hope of rebuilding this church, this spiritual home to many.
Yes, this church is inclusive, wonderfully diverse, and open to all who love God. There’s nothing hateful going on in this church. Attend just once and you get that. This was the first church I landed in when I came to Chattanooga, and I made some great friends there. I can vouch for this: Honesty, love, and acceptance is what this church is all about.
One of the delightful pieces of this story, however, is how other nearby congregations—even ones that likely do not believe or worship in the exact same ways as this UMC does—opened their doors and offered their help. What a wonderful message: We may be different, but you’re welcome here.
If you absorb just one message from this story, absorb this: Open your envelope just one more inch in order to understand another person; sit, momentarily with some discomfort, in service to this understanding; in relationships, in families, in churches, in neighborhoods and communities, manifest this: the overwhelmingly positive, inclusive, and esteem-enhancing message that yes, we’re different…and you’re welcome here.
Just imagine, right now, hearing this from the person or people you most want to hear it from. Perhaps loved ones, family, old fractured friendships. You’re different from me, and you’re welcome here. We’re not going to war over this. C’mon, we’re going to lunch.
A church burned to the ground last week and it’s a shame that it takes a fire to ignite this level of compassion. But several churches rose to the occasion for St. Elmo UMC, just as St. Elmo UMC would have done for them. No agenda but love; no labels to keep anyone out. Just open arms to say that if you need us, we’re here.
As I sit with quiet sorrow, I also sit with hope for the future. I will leave you with several of my favorite meditations. First, from Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, author and director of the Center for Mindfulness and visionary at the Mind and Life Institute: “Mindful dialogue invites true listening, and true listening expands our ways of knowing and understanding. Ultimately, it elevates discourse, and makes it more likely that we will gradually learn and grow from understanding one another’s perspective rather than just fortifying our positions and stereotyping all those who disagree with us.”
Also from Kabat-Zinn: “When a loss stirs great sadness and grief in us, after the wailing and the tears and the tearing of our hair, there comes a time when we have to fall silent. Silence is the ultimate prayer.”
From Montaigne: “When I dance, I dance; when I sleep, I sleep; yes, and when I walk alone in a beautiful orchard, if my thoughts drift to far-off matters for some part of the time I lead them back again to the walk, the orchard, to the sweetness of this solitude, to myself.”
And lastly, from Habitat for Humanity founder Millard Fuller: “For a community to be whole and healthy it must be based on people’s love and concern for each other.”
Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist, minister, and educator, in private practice in Chattanooga, and is the author of “Empowering the Tribe” and “The Power of a Partner.” Visit his web site at www.DrRPH.com where you can email your questions and comments.
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