Chattanooga Pulse

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Written by Pulse Staff
Tuesday, 30 September 2008 22:00

• Contrary to Hollywood belief, prostitutes do not look like Julia Roberts. In fact, a cursory look through mug shots shows quite the opposite to be the general truth. That said, though, even the ladies of the night have a bit of pride in their appearance and don’t appreciate when one of their peers makes unflattering remarks. That’s what happened last week when police were called out to break up an altercation between two street professionals on 12th Avenue after one told the other that she had a mustache. Not surprisingly, the hirsute woman took umbrage at the charge and the argument ended up-loudly-in the street before being broken up by law enforcement.

• The housing market is tough right now, without a doubt. But realtors still don’t expect to be robbed by people they are showing houses to, even with the current housing meltdown. But that’s what happened to a man showing a rental house on Wilson Avenue, who was faced down by three men, one armed with a handgun, and relieved of his cash-all $3,000 that he had on hand. Which is where we would like to remind all realtors that if you must carry large amounts of cash around, don’t flash the cash around to prospective renters beforehand, even if you are just buying one of them a Coke. Some slightly less ethical people notice things like that, and the result in this case was a gun to the gut.

• There’s a reason they call it “dope”, case #127,496. The School Resource Officer at Ooltewah High School had an interesting day last week, starting with one student being arrested for possession of cocaine and hyrdodone. A second student, who had been involved in the drug arrest, became disorderly when the officer seized his money. After things settled down a bit, the disorderly student’s older sister was called to pick him up, but when she and her boyfriend arrived, their actions raised the deputy’s suspicions, and the resulting search of her car yielded marijuana and drug paraphernalia. To put the icing on the cake, at first the officer was only going to arrest the boyfriend, but the sister insisted that since the two were engaged, the dope belonged to both of them. Not about to interfere with future marital togetherness, the deputy obliged and arrested them both.

• How many times do we have to remind people to obey traffic laws? Except for you drug dealers. You keep speeding along and drawing attention to yourselves, like the two narcotic nincompoops who were stopped by police on I-75 last week for speeding. The officer noted they both appeared nervous, and since he also happened to be a K-9 officer with his trusty pooch on hand, he let the dog do what dogs do best-sniff. The end result was the discovery of nearly $40,000 worth of crystal meth and marijuana.